Getting to Know Your Blogger: Living in the central Pennsylvania area is good in some ways, but when it comes to planning a wedding I’ve found it to be pretty limiting. There just isn’t the sheer number of vendors that places like the Philadelphia region has. I’ve been to plenty of weddings around here and they are all pretty much alike, same decorations, same crappy DJ, same overpriced and over-salted catering food.
Awww...after my graduation in 2006
So far in my life I’ve managed to be somewhat abnormal. Some people call it “weird” and other people call it “interesting” so we’ll just stick with ‘abnormal.’ My sweetheart and I met while I was in college working toward an engineering degree. My internship at his job threw us together in what was at first an uneasy mentor/student relationship. This soon developed into a friendship and later, obviously, love.
We have been dating for over 6 years. The first 5 years were long distance because of college, and then my first job. After ten months of living together and getting along just peachy, I asked my best friend to marry me. He was quite surprised, hesitated for an agonizing moment, and then said yes! Later he told me how he was planning to ask me that summer after he’d saved for a ring. So right now neither of us has an engagement ring. Can you tell we like doing things back-assward?
This blog is starting seven months after the engagement. At first I couldn’t really get into it, as we had planned for a late 2010 or even 2011 wedding. As time went on we wondered why we had pushed it out so far, and swung in the complete other direction by discussing a fall 2009 courthouse affair. I was into it until I realized that now, for the first time, I wanted to do something for real, something big, something that showed where I stood in life.
I realized it would cost more money, and time, and probably tears, but I just couldn’t shake it. I’m so proud of our relationship, and the many, many storms it has weathered to get to this point, a courthouse appointment just seemed like a cop out, a meek declaration. Please don’t think I am bashing courthouse weddings, I think they are fabulous!! For us, for the mountain we had to climb, and my personal family history, I needed a big ole’ party.
So now I’m in full on wedding planning mode, tackling way too many diy projects, including the dress, and spending uncomfortable amounts of money. Our budget started at $3,000 which was ‘doable’ for us. Now it’s over $4,000 due to vendor costs. Did I mention we are doing the catering ourselves? Yeah, $4,000 for a 50 guest, self-catered wedding. The only consolation I can give myself is that none of our (many) out-of-town guests will need to pay for hotel rooms since our venue sleeps 26. I’m still feeling awful, and selfish about the decision to do a traditional wedding, but there really isn’t any turning back now unless we forfeit deposits. Many people would think this is pennies for a nice wedding, but to me it’s an enormous sum. The national average of $25,000 does make me feel better about it though!
Question of the Day: Anyone else out there feeling upside-down about spending so much money on a wedding? How did you resolve this with yourself?
More to come…
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